Tips on Interviews

Hi everyone. Hav u felt nervous n not performing up to the mark in interviews? I have written a java aplication on interview tips n hope it helps to ease those interview creep.

* Disclaimer - Read at your own risk. The writer is not responsible for any failed interviews or unpredictable scenarios. Any resemblance of the following scenarios is purely fictitious or coincidental.

public class InterviewApp{
public static void main (String [ ] args) {

Console.writeln("How to succeed in interviews");
Console.writeln();
Console.writeln(" ----------Interview Menu ----------");
Console.writeln();
Console.writeln(" 1. Speak confidently and answer questions politely ");
Console.writeln(“ 2. Keep quiet, dun answer any questions n stare at the interviewer. That’s right keep staring.”);
Console.writeln(” 3 Feeling hot? Remove ur shirt button slowly.”);
Console.writeln(“ 4. Be comfortable n prick ur nose. Then lick ur fingers n say Mamamia!”);
Console.writeln(" 5. Seduce The interviewer… Tell him/her about the ur personal assets ");
Console.writeln(" 6. Feeling gassy or wanting to pee? Juz let it out in front of the interviewer.");
Console.writeln(" 7. Turn off the lights in the interview rm n sing loudly “U Light Up My Life ");
Console.writeln(" 8. Threaten the interviewer… If u dun employ me, I’m going to lock u in the rm. Juz u n me. ");
Console.writeln(“ 9. Tell long soap operas-stories… make the interviewer sleep n grab the sheet of paper he/she is holding n write ~ Suitable candidate, employed”);
Console.writeln(“10. At the end of the interview, remember to shake hands n say “ I will be missing u so much.”);

int opt = Console.readInt("Enter Your Choice:___ );

if (opt != 0 && opt =<10)
{
Console.writeln("Fail Interview!");
}
else
{
Console.writeln("Fail Interview!");
}
}}

Xuan's thesis on the application ~ The truth is always ugly.